When you feel bad, that's your beeping red light on the dashboard. Like an airplane, you're actually equipped to notice when you get off-course. Here are three best practices for faster course correction.
Which means you won't have so many opportunities to apologize! Every time you do that, you're re-wiring your brain, In BEFORE things get out of hand, so you can course correct before things go too far off track. The solution is to give yourself the support you need, so you can stay more centered and emotionally generous on a daily basis. If we don't do this hard work, we leave that boulder for our children to push. We can do hard things if we give ourselves support. But thatĭoesn't excuse us from doing it, even if sometimes it feels like pushing a boulder uphill. This is the most difficult work any of us can do. If you sometimes feel despairing about being able to change your behavior, you aren't alone. But the solution is to change your behavior, not to stop apologizing! Worried that if you apologize every time you raise your voice, your child will begin to mistrust your apologies? You're right that it erodes trust to apologizeĪnd then not change your behavior. Most essential lessons: That we all make mistakes, that we can all recover, that relationships are resilient and each of us has the power to repair So when you find yourself off track, don't be afraid to pause, re-group, apologize to your child, and find a way to repair. No river wide enough" to keep your love from getting through.
AHA MOMENT MISTAKES SERIES
In fact, all relationships are a constant series of connectionsĪnd disconnections, missteps and course corrections. There’s no way to stay constantly on a path of harmony, without occasional wrong turns. We feel hurt, we feel frustrated, we feel trapped. Realizing that they're having a hard time. We see the other person as making our life more difficult, rather than We get disconnected - from our child, our partner, our own deepest guidance. The bad news is that even if we’re committed to being the best parent, and best person, we can be, we will never be perfect. That sometimes you aren’t the parent or the person you want to be.
May have noticed that you aren’t perfect.
The hope lies in the vision and in the plan and in the courage to keep coming back on course, time and time again.” The flight of that airplane is the perfect metaphor for family life… It doesn’t make any difference if we are off target or even if our family is a mess. During the flight, the pilots make constant adjustments to get back on track. “Before the plane takes off, the pilots have a flight plan… but during the course of the flight, wind, rain, turbulence, air traffic, human error, and other factors act on the plane… 90% of the time the plane is not even on the prescribed flight path.
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